So i had an epiphany the other day, well it actually came up an smacked me in the face so to speak. It became painfully apparent to me that I spend way to much time focusing on my weight and what I eat when one evening, after dinner, my daughter (who is a very impressionable 3 1/2 year old) ran into the living room, grabbed a large book, placed it on her lap, and proceeded to pretend to "track her points" (i.e. Weight Watchers points)! At first I was amused, "Oh look at my little girl... she's emulating mommy! How cute." But then over the course of the next few weeks I noticed her wanting to step on the scale in my bathroom - alot (because she sees me do it every day... sometimes multiple times a day...), pretending to track points, making comments about the "fat girl" in gymnastics (nothing horrible, she just said "Look mommy, there is a fat girl in that class", but nothing that I want her to say...), and I'm sitting here questioning what I am doing. I want to be healthy, lose weight, and who am I kidding... look hot in a swim suit, but what am I teaching my daughter? It's time to re-evaluate what I am doing.
I've been thinking alot about the book I read by Valerie Frankel "Thin is the New Happy". In it she talks about breaking free from her 30+ years of yo-yo dieting and learning to live healthy. Now, I don't think that I yo-yo diet. I mean how could I, I've been doing WW for 1 1/2 years. But, I am so incredibly focused on what I eat, what I don't eat, and how many points it is. Is that healthy? Well, I am thinking that it is not a very healthy way to live in the long run, to be so focused on how many points things are, my size, and my weight. If I am having that huge of an impact on my daughter at 3 1/2, what about when she is a preteen or teenager when young girls are so focused on body image, and the majority have low self images.
So, I am making a new commitment to myself and it is actually a challenge from my husband. Try to go one week with out tracking points or weighing myself. Make healthy food choices, live an active lifestyle (I work out almost 5x/week), and then reassess to see how I am doing. I'm in no way saying that WW is bad. I've learned so much about healthy eating, healthy cooking, and healthy living from them. I think it is an awesome program to teach those, like me, who had no idea where or how to start in their weight loss (excuse me... healthy living) journey, but I am wondering if, like Valerie, I can break free of the diet chains... we'll see if the great experiment works!
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